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August 10, 2022
March 28, 2009
Kawan ketawa banyak-banyak, kawan menangis? hurmm..awak ada berapa? Saya ada 2..
20 minutes on cross training, 20 minutes on bicycle and 10 minutes on weight training. Not so much, I know tapi kita pelan-pelan kayuh k? Wanted to complete my exercise with rowing tapi saya malu lah sorang-sorang dekat situ nak rowing sebelah pakcik2 tough. hahaha poyo..
Hurmm..
It is ironic when people be all happy for YOU when YOUR exams are done but you just can't feel the same. Oh I'm so sorry I just can't help it to show my real feeling. It is too big to be hidden. I feel so bad :( Thanks for reminding me I'm done with me exams though :)
It is ironic too when suddenly everyone is there to cheer you up with the finishing of your exam but who were there with you when you were all stressful and painful?
Hehe..saja je nak emo2. excuse me~
March 01, 2009
Aku adalah emo lagi psycho
Sumpah stress.
Those things that really make me ticked off :
- balik Malaysia. or anything about balik Malaysia. Doesn't matter what part of balik Malaysia lah. Kau balik aku tak balik ke. Kau balik awal aku balik lambat ke. Kenapa kau tak balik ke. Kalau aku ada duit, aku balek. Kalau aku banyak masa, aku balek. Kalau aku takde manyak exam camni, aku balek. So yeah, i don't have money, i don't have enough time and i have loads of exam so I can't go back.
- Seeing the balance in my account. Although actually I have a saving account, but i really don't want to touch 'em. Lucky me I've still got people owing me some monay..Money makes the world goes around. But in my case, money makes me stay put in Cork. lolz. And money makes my bestfren sad too :( Please, don't be sad my frenggg..
- Seeing the amount of things that I need to revise within this short period of time. Yes, this is my own fault. Procrastinate lagi kan. ficketyfucketyfish
- oh i miss kueytiow goreng! especially mom's. but at this moment, any kind of kueytiow goreng would do me good. cork oh cork napa takde kueytiow :(
- i really wanna go somewhere but reason #2 doesn't allow me to do so. i wanna go to maksemah's. untung2 bleh dpt mkn kueytiow :) or i wanna go to wawa's. or to anyone who would actually can calm me down. blergh.
Arghhh...really need to KEEP IT COOL..KEEP IT COOL..
oh by the way, sapa yang terkena atau bakal kena serangan emo saya, SORRY!
January 01, 2009
Meroyan
He's stranded in Dublin now :(
I miss my MacBabe.........
Yesterday I had a bad dream -> My current balance is €209 but my credit card total is €210.
Up until now, I'm still afraid to check the balance in the account and the credit card amount. Huhu..
Welcome 2009. An interesting opening indeed, huh? :(
Stressssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
August 08, 2008

Yesterday I went swimming alone. Yes, alone.
And today I played futsal at somewhere around Bukit Jalil. Some people asked whether my legs are okay or not. Err...honestly I don't know how to define okay la. The bump is still there but I still can walk properly and run and swim. That's why I've been challenging the legs to do some rough activities to find out whether it's okay or not. But not too much la. Main futsal pun takut-takut je. Orang sepak masuk goal pun blur2 biarkan. Nak rebut bola dari orang pun takut2. But I really need to go for a checkup since I need a qualified person to clarify the err..okayness of my legs.
Damn it la. Seriously penat secara emosional memudaratkan diri.Plus, the only hope to runaway from the everything next week is lost due to some reasons. I hope this pain is taken away from me. The faster the better :-(
pi/es: smuorangprivateprivateblog:(wapunnakprivatejugeklahcamneh:(
pi/pi/es : esok reunion! Whoaaahhhh tak sabaarrrrrr
Eh cop. Who watched Olympics' opening? Cool giler kan the drummsss (smpat tengok yg tu kejap and a bit of the dancing since I went out for dinner with mak and fuzah). Damn nanti kawen nak ade macamtu bleh ke tak aa...
July 24, 2008
sesi luahan perasaan

Okay sebenarnya saya tengah jiwa kacau. Kacau macam Mc Flurry Oreo atau Cornetto (kegemaran baru saya. yang cair punya setaap) yang dikacau dengan menggunakan sudu yang diattach pada machine itu. Ngeng ngeng bunyi dia dikacau. Nak cari bunyi lain macam tak terlintas. Ngeng ngeng jugak keluar tapi bunyi dia ade macam rempit sikitlah.
Sempena dengan usia yang bakal bertambah ni (*alert alert wiu wiu wiu hint hint wink wink ne no ne no*) banyak perkara yang membenakkan otak saya*sigh*. Terutamanya tentang arah tuju hidup saya. Cey cey cecemelll...baru nak masuk 2nd year dah nak cari arah tuju hidup kan. Tapi biarlah..biarlah saya nak rasa hidup saya ada wawasan sikit. Dulu sekolah rendah kalau tengok tengok kat buku autograf kita letak cita-cita kan. Macam saya punya dulu ada macam-macam version. Yang biasa saya letak nak jadi peguam@doktor@businesswoman. Tuuuu..dia ambitious sangat kan sampai tiga. Tapi bila dah besar sikit saya dah kecikkan skop nak jadi doktor. Sampai lah form 4 tetibe rasa cam Biology susah bebenor saya divert sikit-sikit dapat jadi engineer pun ok gak. Tapi tiba-tiba SPM Biology saya tak teruk sangat baru ada confident nak amik doktor balik. Tapi pikir punya pikir takut scholarship tu competitive sangat saya pilih amik dentistry. Memang indecisive from now then and forever.

So itu lah kira-kiranya roughly sejarah saya amik dentistry. Penat jugak nak jawab kat orang dengan FAQ (frequently asked question) tu. "nape amik dentistry?" "eh ko memang minat eh gigi gigi ni" "nape ko tak amik medic kenapa amik dentistry"
Rasa kalau ditanya soalan tu rasa nak
Pastu bila tengok orang lain belajar medic macam menarik je kan. Lagi-lagi bila jadi golongan minor. Tak berteman keseoorangan..Sedih je rase *sob sob sob* Tapi saya tarahal lah...benda-benda ni benda kecik je. Masa tengah meroyan ke ape je barulah ungkit kan. Tu yang saya rasa cam nak buat plan je kan. Tapi kenalah selalu ingat kita hidup ni hanya merancang tapi Tuhan yang tentukan. Cewyyywaaahh cecemell..
Memula saya macam ada plan gila rasa nak ambil medic lepas dah ada degree ni. Tapi eh *snap* back into reality awak tu scholar kerajaan ada seploh tahun bond dengan kerajaan ada hati kan nak buat bukan2.Okay so cari plan yang lebih real sikit. Saya ingat nak buat specialist dalam Oral and Macillofacial Surgery lah. Tapi kan...macam susah..Mau tak kawin dibuatnya karang. Pastu boleh ke saya handle. Anatomy pon cukup makan je *sigh* But that's the closest to medicine that I can do. And if I really want to do it, I really really really (really to infinity) need to work my arse off hard.

Kahwin pun satu hal jugak. Mak kata kalau saya tak kurus-kurus nanti tak kahwin. *sigh* lagi (entry paling banyak mengeluh)
*diam bertafakur tak boleh nak elaborate lebih*
Huerm fine lepas ni malas dah nak masak balik Ireland nanti. Tu lah dah pandai masak pastu makan. Pastu makan jadi ape? Jadi lah tu...bulat bulat bagai boleh bergolek. Kalau jadi bola ok lagi orang boleh main futsal. Ni jadi orang bulat...haishh..kucing pun tak nak berkawan.
Baru teringat yang saya perlu kembali ke Ireland *sigh* Boleh tak nak cakap...bencilah. Malasnya. Malas sangat. Reason being...huerm banyak sangat reason nye. Senang citer I enjoy being here with my close circle of friend and family. Celah manalah nak cari orang-orang cam diorang ni...*sigh*
Ok lah entry dah makin mengarut tapi tu lah main point nye. Arah tuju dalam hidup saya. Saya nak grad sihat-sihat (bukan sihat=180kg) pastu kerja 3 tahun. CheMi ajak saya mintak posting kat Sabah/Sarawak. Tuuuu dia lagi cita-cita menggunung Kinabalu. Pastu rezeki/semangat ada boleh lah sambung.
Oh by the way ade pengumuman. Ting tong ting tong...
siapa mahu beli camera saya Casio Exilim Z75. 7.2 megapixel, 3x optical zoom. Market price saya usha tadi dlm RM699 but I'm letting it go at RM350-400 sajorks. Comes with memory card some more dan ya, kalernye adalah pink, exactly cam dalam gambar. And it is still negotiable ok. Reason being saya *rasa macam* nak angkat DSLR. Beli la beli la..kalau berminat boleh email saya kat nzra_007@yahoo.com. Nak call pun boleh ade nombor fon saya dalam blog ni kalau tere carilah.

June 07, 2008
Hidup saya yang tiada life
I need something to refill my life. Be it pergi buat kerja amal kat umah anak yatim ke, jadi sukarelawan sukma ke mengajar kanak-kanak tuisyen ke. I need to regain my sense of belongingness.. (tatau la camne ni boleh kembalikan my sense of belongingness kan)
Or else I need to go for a beach walk. Preferably without the mat rempits pls? They are such an eyesore.
Tapi tadi dah jumpe Mak Pah Mak Tip Cik Pi Uncle Kamal Uncle Mazlan Cik Imah...ahh..best best best.Lame tak dengar diorang ketawa2..
Pastu esok jumpa ramai lagi.uuu..best2 tak sabar..
p/s : can't wait for my next week. hopefully the pd plan is still on :) Ida cepat lah balik!!!!
p/p/s : another thing to anticipate is the date. hahaha..let's just keep that a secret until betul2 jadi :P
May 19, 2008
GO PRIVATE
I'm thinking of going private with this blog....ergh...tatau kenapa
toldcha i'm pms likethat.
p.s. : Who would want to get access to my blog do mail me at nzra_007@yahoo.com. Manelah tau memang jadi gile betul ke nak privatekan blog. (eventho probability dia kurang daripada 0.01% and kalau ikut law doc takkan disclose side effect ni kat pesakit)
One more freakin day to go bebeh!
Takkan lagi aku menunggu
kau hadir di dalam mimpi-mimpiku
puasku mengharapkan dirimu
seperti mereka yang punya cinta
Diriku tanpa dirimu
kau tempuhi penuh bahagia
diriku mahu kau tahu
pedih ini kau tak terasa
Warkahku mengharapkan dirimu
seperti yang aku kenali dulu
setiaku menantikan dirimu
seperti setianya terhadap diriku
Tapiku melepaskan mu
melangkah namun tak berdaya
terusku terus menunggu
cinta yang takkan pernah ada
April 29, 2008
Losing the sanity
Was down with the biochem test. Tried to go on with the revision but failed :( I wanted to spend the money in the cafe for a therapy BUT due to the construction going on the College Road, bekalan air was cut down. Bengang bengang bengang. I tried to sleep off the resentment with my power nap strategy but again, it failed miserably.
Then Adilah came and inspired me to go to town. It was pouring down when I set off but I was so determined. Hopped on the bus and minutes later I realized I was, actually in town. Went to Zamzam to buy paratha and something convenient for exam's week. Went to Tesco. Bought things and took bus back to home.
Sekali balik-balik sedar-sedar 40euro abis. Huh...
But it's okay. at least I felt better now :)
April 27, 2008
Severe homesick
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Lo and behold my friends,
The HoMeSiCk virus is attacking again..
Stress + exam + homesick = disaster.
Like..seriously seriously, perlu ke nak datang sekarang?!?!??!?!
I browsed thru the pictures. Worrying will I be able to recognize their face anymore? (hehe..over sikit baru 9 bulan tak jumpe)
Bosan lah kan asyik cerita homesick je? hehehhe..
P/S : Duit JPA baru masuk semalam. Elaun buku + perkakas + sara hidup 3 months. Bleh la saye bajet untuk bayar sewa rumah + joli di Oz & Melesia + simpanan di masa hadapan. Yeayyyy..tenkiu Encik JPA me laff u muah muah~~

April 17, 2008
Gibberish

I am currently repositioning my studying area to fit my unfit leg. Lenguh la study kat meja bile the leg is left hanging gittew. SO I'm studying on my bed. Phuhh...harap-haraplah boleh. I used to study on the bed during my SPM days and IB days. Should be okay I guess. Cuma kena menghadap view yang very the unpleasant sahajalah. Cobaan...
Since I'm staying with people from Iceland, I had to wear extra clothing in my own room. Benci bukan? Plus I'm having fever + runny nose at the moment. Demam tension..heh..
Medical bill settled. Queries on claim pon dah hantar kat En Jamal. Waiting for the reply. Appointment for 2nd varicella jap pon dah buat. Terbang lagi 40eu lah gamaknye..Printing dah pass kat Adilah. Now I am left with some money to be banked in. Tatau bile nak panjat bukit tu gi bank....Maybe I'm gonna do it next week sekali arung gi amik varicella jap.
Today I'm fasting (insyaAllah). Food pun takde. Nak keluar pun susah. Kitchen like hell with occupied devils. So might as well fast. Bleh la shed off fat yang dikumpul the last 2 weeks...hee...
Yada yada bla bla...complaint je keje. Study tak lagi!
March 31, 2008
Mandi
I took 3 minutes to step into the bathroom
5 minutes to prepare
5 minutes to set up the place, taking the shower foam etc etc
3 minutes to get the shower thingy out of it place
5 minutes showering
but at least I managed to do it myself. altho I hit my right leg a lil bit but it's ok, at least I showered on my own :)
anyway thanks to Taq and Dayah for the hair treatment. ohhh saya terasa seperti cerita pondok buruk *tune into the sad song*
kaki saya sakit lagi. berdiri salah duduk salah baring pun salah..
saya cuba...saya berusaha untuk berusaha.
tapi terimakasih lah itu untuk itu. ceria sikit hari saya (walaupun dah agak lambat) :)
March 28, 2008
Biyatch
Today I would declare the stinki-est day in my life. Bangun. Netball. Tertido. Gi town amik the Manchester girls. Hehehe...but not until just now. I've took a longggggg shower to wash away all the worriness and stress. Walaupun masuk bilik stress itu wujud kembali, at least I manage to reduce the snowballing stress kan. Nanti tak pasal-pasal mahu perang dunia kesembilan berlaku.
And ever heard that u'll suffocate if u turn on the heater and shut off the window? What's the point of using heater if u still let the freezing breeze inside?
You tell people u're all stressed up with your studies, family and lover. And you justify your kecurangan on the basis of I-am-stress-I-need-ppl-to-take-care-of-me. What the fish, people, what the hell?? Cisss, pantang sungguh saya melihat perkara begini berleluasa. KeCurangan. Hypocrisy.
But at the end of the day, other people are enjoying their life and I will be left alone, full of anger. So it's better to suck up everything and pretend like u're the heartless and eyeless thing who doesn't give a damn on how ppl ruin/run their life. Unless if u step up into my privacy la of course kan. I guess this is the lesson learnt from my past. Cursing and Ignoring ppl like a total stranger. Thanks to the 2 people of my past who taught me this invaluable lesson of life.
2 months, Nadz. There're just 2 months to go :)
Sing along with me : "everything's gonna be allrighttttttt~"
March 19, 2008
Annoyance at peak

One of my bad habit in studying includes getting annoyed pretty easily with any kind of noise. Especially made from unpleasant sources. That made me even more distracted. It would be a pleasure if I managed to kill the source and keep it shut forever.
In mid of SPM week years ago, I remembered isolating myself from the others. I'll go to the empty classes or empty dorms. Thank God at that time only the fifth formers left in the school so I have plenty of spaces to mess with.
I also need a big big space for studying coz I need to put all my books on the table. And my current study space? Defo not enough to occupy my needs but I think I just gotta live with it. Back in MCB the study table aren't big tho but I managed to turn my bed into studying space with less probability of falling asleep on it.
However, when I'm on the peak of angst, I'll turn on loud music onto my ears. That also applies to any kind of stressful condition or if I just don't feel like talking to other ppl. That's how I channel my anger. The louder the better that I think my eardrum will lose its compliancy at faster rate. So if u see me around with my iPod on, stay away ppl, u might be the next ppl I want to kill =P
Yes, I definitely am freaking out. The fact that my first Anatomy continuous assessment was a big slack made me half mad these days. The second one would be totally in different league than the first. We have flag test for the first part and short answer + MCQ for the second. Flag test is a test on the cadaver where they basically labeled the nerves, muscles, and blood vessels on them to be recognized.
Mari mari kembali pelajari Anatomy.....
March 18, 2008
Arosa oh Arosa..
Before we went, I called the landlord. I did ask her about us moving in during late of May since we are still bounded to the current contract and the sponsors are still paying for our current apartment. She said "YES" and I was so happy.....but not so long until we actually met and she said "NO". Guess it was a miscommunication or just plain misunderstanding T_T
By the way the house is superb. There are 6 bedrooms and yet there is still a living room. The kitchen is quite spacey and the backyard was awesome. Before the bad news were broken we even imagined ourselves getting the house and started to choose which bedroom we wanted to..
Alas, that was all left in our imagination. Goodbye our dream house. Hope nobody wants you so u'll finally be ours! Muahahahhahaha...in ur dream la!


Had I have some €€€€€€ I would just go for this house...this house is close to perfect! Guess it's just not our rezeki..
Why am I all-geared to find the house? I dunno. Maybe the current situation has just made me wanna leave this place ASAP so I'll no longer need to confront any unpleasant face(s). This is just so torturing. Knowing that u have to breathe the same oxygen with the ppl u don't really want to, it just make me wanna puke to death.....

O our Lord, make easy, and do not make difficult :)
OMG It's been 6 months......sudah ENAM bulan since I left Malaysia. And there's about 2 and half months till we meet again. Waaaaaa.....homesickkkkkkk =(
Cepatla April...............saya mahu jumpe mak sayeeeeee...... *humming to Fazley's Bila April* eee...gile lame!!!
March 15, 2008
The haunted room
What do you feel, after such a long and tiring day, u walk into your house with the hope to have a good rest but instead found out that your kitchen is in a big mess and knowing that only u and only u alone left to handle it?


Let's have a close-up. Tons of plates, glasses, cups.
*eeeeee...bengangs*
This is the living room area. Lying low on the floor is Mr Roger Moore. A naked man who always there along with any of their birthday celebrations. Yeap, I mean really naked with all those unnecessary protruding stuff and lots of chess hair. Sometimes they give him some clothes but most of the times he is as what he is. The partial poster is a poster of Audrey Hepburn. The balloons are for one of my external housemate's 18th birthday celebration. 18. Patut aa perangai cam kekanak lagi. But if u see the alcohol intake and cigarettes they have, u won't really believe they are only 18y-old girls. Oh ya, the partially captured sofa is also called as the sex couch. Go figure urself why it is called so...

This is why I loathe upon going to the kitchen during weekdays. This is their major room. Watch tv all the day and eat and drink on the way. Everything within 2-3 footsteps. Easily reached easily done.
This room used to be very peaceful during weekend. I used to study on the table coz I really need a bigger space for my books. But recently it has also turned out to be a bilik kelamin for some people too. Bahagiaaaaaa hidup 'suami isteri' bagai itu rumah mereka yang empunya....
That's why I spent the whole weekend studying in Brookfield. Haihh.....can't wait to go out from this place...
Oh by the way today we made an appointment with a lady landlord (or should it be landlady??). Hopefully everything will go well....
I don't usually be this bitchy. But yeah, I reached my boiling temperature and I just need to explode.
March 14, 2008
BENCIIIIIIII
tak aciiiiii
tak aciiiiii
Air Asia Kejiiiiiiii skang baru nak bagi free seatssssss
beeeennnnnncccchhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
RM249 okayhhh
50 euro
*********nangisssssssss***********
February 28, 2008
Geram!
U can use when u want. u throw it away when u don't want
I am human. I have feelings too y'know? (ayat cliche org emo)
That's it.
tak berbeda
engkau manusia, aku manusia
semua punya hati
punya perasaan
bisa terluka
mungkin saja
aku mendendam biar pun ku manis
tapi aku benci
dulu kita baik
tapi kini lain
tiada maafku
jalan kita memang harus begini
tak usah menyesal
kau kan yang mahu
kau yang membuat
kesalahamnya
tiada maaf bagimu
Coz there's nothing left to tell about pun.
layan Shin Chan lg bagus (idea dari bro Mad Redo1)
nih old skool nye Shin Chan. Shinchan less than siri ke 5 je camneh. Maybe time ni diernye cartoonist baru-baru lagi nak aadapt..
February 25, 2008
Viva la Varicella
First off I saw this one person I fancy today. And the only thing X gave me was a cold brush look that totally breaks my heart to pieces.
And then I had VARICELLA VACCINATION. It's for chicken pox and it's a live vaccine. Meaning, I may get the chicken pox itself had my immune system failed to produce enough antibody against the live vaccine they injected me.
This is seriously frightening. I can't afford to lose a few days and down with the fever. Let alone be CHICKENPOX fever. I don't have my mommy to take care of me. I am surrounded by busy medic students who hardly have time for themselves. I have exams in the coming few weeks. I have deadlines to catch up =(
I think I'm overreacting. Here's what I Wikipedia-ed :
Vaccination reactions
Common and mild reactions following vaccination may include:
- Fever of 101.9 (38.9 C) up to 42 days after injection
- Soreness, itching at the site of injection within 2 days
- Rash occurring at site of injection anywhere from 8 to 19 days after injection. If this happens you are considered contagious.
- Rash on other parts of body anywhere from 5 to 26 days after injection. If this happens you are considered contagious.
Fever and discomfort may be lessened by taking medication containing paracetamol (aka acetaminophen, such as Panadol, Tempra, Tylenol) or ibuprofen.
So I may need until 5-8 days before I could see any signs. Ohhhhhh my immune system, toughen up and please please please fight this antigen. I know u are strronggg..
And, crap. I did something bad onto my roomie and now she's pissed off. T_T
SORRY!!!
and...being a transitional adult is tiring. There's an inner rebellion in yourself that is waiting to explode, yet you have to stay professional and calm through it. U cannot act childish and u cannot be the innocent one.
11 hours to go before tomorrow becomes today. aih..
p/s : i'm such a crap. hari mengdownkan diri bermula. tenkiu!February 24, 2008
I think I'm better off myself
At my house. Apparently that is the expression I shown at most of my pics. And those two tanduks is from my bro. Heh.
Credit to Kak Murni for the pixies. Thanks!
Make a satay goreng , done.
Swiss & France hotel reservation , undone.
Principles of Human Structure lab, undone.
Biochem lab, undone.
Post my customer's eBay book (yeap apparently I am being an eBay seller and my 1st book sold to an Italian girl at €7 when the actual cost of the book is €2. heh ), undone.
Housekeeping, undone.
Sorting out my notes, undone.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaa.....mode bengong kembali..