May 31, 2012

Life post-exam

Life post-exam has been....busy. I actually slept lesser than I did during exam time. Yes, my exam weeks were so draggy that I had all the time in the world to finish all those vlogs movies and whatnot.

Started off with packing things that I'm bringing back home. Had 1 box all packed and ready to go. In the midst of second one, sparing some space to shop. I think I *might* need a third one. See first how crazy I am with buying things etc. Throwing off things that I definitely won't use back home. Had 2 bags of I-won't-wear clothes that I donated to the charity box. Packing is really really tiring but I know I cannot procrastinate! Seeing how my 2 housemates doing things last minute....I strictly reminded myself must not wait! Am quite happy with the progress I'm now down with a few things that its fate can only be decided after I'm done with traveling.

I also sell a few things, books, instruments. Rasa macam sayang but I think I need to let it go because I kinda need money now.

Yesterday and today I tried to settle the official things. Getting academic transcripts, sent results to JPA, trying to clear the lockers in hospital. Done with all those. Now I need to concentrate on the traveling. Mak is coming next weeeeeeek!! Weeeee I can't wait. Flying off to London next Thursday. And ABANG NAYLI AND KAKDIAH are coming too!!!!! Kinda like a last minute thing they just bought tickets a few days ago. Only for a short time tho coz they will be traveling somewhere else tapi bersyukur lah diorang datang. Plus, 2 of my bestest friends are coming too. Can't ask for more. I think I'm the happiest girl in the world as of now.

Life post-exam, although a lot tiring, but it is definitely less worrying. Kinda feel like after SPM where I don't have things to be worried of eventhough this is just another start to a longer journey. But I'm just living and enjoying the moment :-)

Ya Allah, thank you for all of this.

May 25, 2012

5 years Dental School - DONE!


Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah.

The day I've been waiting for since the past 5 years has finally arrived.

I have passed the final year!

...and I'm leaving this Land of Leprechauns in about 36 days :')

May 24, 2012

Summer exams officially over

It's over.

The long torturous 7/8 weeks are over. The day has finally came.

The last bit of exam went OK-ish. I had a seen case exam where I brought in the patient that I've been treating and I have to present what changes I did and everything. It could have been done better but I'm happy at least it didn't messed up badly. My patient is really really nice and supportive. I think the fact that he himself has a child doing medic, he understands how stressful I am. Yup, he's the same patient who gave me the voucher. He even wanted me to text him my result this Friday when it comes out. Kinda like a father figure and I'm so thankful I have encountered such a great person in my life.

Speaking about the results....yes it's coming out this Friday. And yes, it IS that fast. Praying hard that the lecturers tutors who are in the exam board, may Allah opens their heart to let me pass this year.

Exam's over but I'm still gonna have sleepless nights until this Friday. Trying to distract myself by cleaning up the kitchen and my room. It was all done kinda half way-ish. I have about 40 hours more to survive (+/- sleeping time) til the D day.

Tik tok, tiki tiki tok.....

May 22, 2012

Because I have the awesome-est patient in the world!!!

Got this from my patient this afternoon. Remembered telling him about how nice Fishy Fishy restaurant was..and he got me this voucher! Very the thoughtful!!

Alhamdulillah for the rezeki :D
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld

May 21, 2012

Keep holding on

Been home alone for 2 nights already. Sigh.

I have 2 more clinical exams to go! It's really hard to bring myself to actually read something. Been watching around 4 movies since yesterday? Fuuuu I hope I won't be screwed up!

Lompat lompat bertahan. Push push just keep swimming...
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld

May 15, 2012

My oh my!

I thought these remaining days are gonna fly! But's creeping so slow I've finished watching around 100++ vlogs and 26 episodes of So Little Time. The series aren't even interesting!

Haven't done much studies these days. Really really losing it already. I cooked. I cleaned. I did everything but when it came to study, I just couldn't focus anymore...

Plus today, my partner in crime of 5 years flew back home. I can't lie. I'm kind of in the depression mode right now and her leaving sure did not help. My eyes start to tear to random things and I am losing will to do stuff.

Ya Allah, please help me through this...

May 10, 2012

Post orals rant

Kind of debating with myself whether or not to make my usual post exam rant. But heck it, this might be useful some day innit?

First thing in the morning we had session with patient. I was really nervous but the moment I entered the room and saw a very pleasant smile from the patient, it kinda calmed me down. Tried to hide my nervousness and went on and do the history and examination. The patient even made a remark "you look very calm" so I had to admit to her that I my heart feels like exploding already actually.

History and examination went on fine. I think I got the necessary things. And then the time's up, so the examiners came into the room. I got Prof S and Dr OS as my examiners and Dr B as the observer.

My brain started to be the scumbag as it always is and I got really really nervous. First mistake was addressing Prof S as Prof rather than Professor. That's kinda a no-no for him.

I presented my case to Dr OS. Patient with history of dry mouth. On pilocarpine, Bioxtra and Duraphat. She has a risk of developing primary biliary cirrhosis (or she has it already i'm not sure) so she had to do a liver function test every 6 months. Used to be really severe but now that she is being treated, it got under control. Tongue was heavily fissured as well. I think the presentation went on Ok-ish. Alhamdulillah my words came out OK eventhough there were loads of Ummm's in between my sentences. That's just like a habit I guess? She asked me a few questions like side effects of pilocarpine, cause of her xerostomia, Sjogren syndrome, some autoimmune diseases.

And then came the questions session with Prof S. I was asked about other causes of Xerostomia. The tests that I would do  - salivary flow rate test, biopsy of gland and what will I be expected to see histologically, full blood count for autoantibody screen Rheumatoid factor, anti SSA SSB, sialogram and how to conduct a sialogram which made me stutter because I don't quite know the exact procedure and etc. Other question why she need to be reviewed. Talked about possibility of infection and lymphomatous change. How to differentiate between parotid swelling caused by lymphoma and infection. How to do biopsy on parotid gland. How to treat infection anddd the time was up before he could drill me more. So that's about it.

The afternoon session we had another oral session without a patient. I was really really really nervous because I'll be having an external examiner as one of my examiner. The thought of having a person that I'm so unfamiliar with really made my mind wrecked and some of my classmates had quite a hard time with him. I used to "attach" with all other examiners so being around them felt much better. I was restless. So nervous.

Stepped into the room. Was shown a picture of generalised gingival swelling, had to come out with differential diagnosis. I came out with leukemic infiltration and Dr McC went on about leukemia - what is it, how to diagnose, how to manage. Then she gave me Equitamp - an absorbable cellulose used for post extraction haermorrhage, and we went on about bleeding problem, liver disease, splenomegaly, platelet diorder anddd coagulation cascade..which thank God I revised last weekend in our study group.  7 minutes up and it was the external's turn to question me.

"What do you know about the term Sialolithiasis"

Effed. I know this term. It's just that the brain was so overwhelmed with nervousness that I couldn't think well so I went on and answered...

"Urmm...I know Sialo had to do something with salivary gland..but I'm not quite sure about lithiasis..."

So he helped me out and came with the layman's term - salivary gland calculus. Talked about the gland involved which I messed up between sublingual and submandibular...ended up him giving me a 60 seconds anatomy lesson. Talked about type of secretion, how to diagnose, how to treat. How to do biopsy...againnnnnnnn sialogram which I messed up in the morning session, was asked! Stuttered a lot with him. He wanted me to come out with infection and antibiotic treatment but I was so dumb it took me a while and the time was up before he could ask me about the treatment. With him, I can feel that my face was reddening, felt so warm and I kinda feel like vomiting.Time flew and it finally ended.

Stepped out of the room, I must look really wrecked but convinced my classmates who were waiting outside that they'll be fine. I don't want to make them terrified but I knew my facial expression can't lie. I looked like I was just being tortured. Later that day I even got text from my classmate checking me out to see if I'm okay because I looked really bad after the oral.

I tried to remain calm and not to dwell too much on the orals. Tawakkal je yang mampu sekarang. Met Dr B, the observer of my morning session and he said I did really really well. That must be just him being nice to everyone but if I really did, I hope that could help me to pass this exam.

The orals were deliberated yesterday. None of us were in the borderlines pass/fail so this just means that if there's anyone that failed, they are nowhere near 48 or 49% No mercy on us only the borderlines got called.

Ya Allah please ease my way towards graduating.

4 more orals to go!

May 07, 2012

Of Woaahhhh's and Waaaaaaa's

Woaaahhhhh..Haven't been posting from blogger for a while. Selama ni hantar through BB sajorks. The interface has changed a lot! It claimed to be easier to use but I think it's kind of confusing?

Anywayyyyyyy I'm done with the written paper. Paeds/Ortho/Public Health paper was rather....unexpected. I hope the examiners are lenient enough to give me good marks :S

The bigger, major, scarier parts are here now. THE ORALS. Where you'll be judge in 15 minutes. It does not only tests your ability to think fast, but also your ability to remain calm, be organized and work well under pressure...which I think is kinda hard. You might know the stuff, but you might be so nervous that you can't translate the info from your brain to words. You might not know the stuff, but if you are clever enough you can spin things that made the examiners believe you are fit enough to graduate.

3 more weeks to go. I think it's going to fly through!

Ya Allah, semoga Nadzirah tenang-tenang sahaja menjawab soalan. Lembutkan hati examiner2 supaya bagi Nadzirah markah tinggi-tinggi. Amiin..

May 04, 2012

Cuak muak

Cuaks ni cuaks. One more written paper tomorrow. And then I'll have orals for the next 3 weeks. Actually...orals are more scary. But right not..I need to focus. Step by step, one by one..

Makin hari makin rasa jiwa ditarik keluar perlahan2 oleh exam. Gagaga. But everytime I skype home with mak or nayli I got the "kick" again. I need to graduate. Pronto. Don't want to miss anything no more back home.

Bismillah, permudahkanlah ya Allah.

"Ya Allah, permudahkanlah perjalanan Nadzirah dalam final year ni dan berikanlah kejayaan untuk Nadzirah graduate pada bulan Jun 2012 ni"

Meh tlg doakan ramai2 meh..
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld