Pages

March 05, 2015

Paranoia

Kita mulakan entry harini dengan lenggok ala Luna Maya dan AC Mizal ---- paranoyyyyya~~~
Eh yeke dia nyanyi ni dengan Luna Maya. Aku pun tak pasti. Kalau tak silap lagu ni kalau dapat 1juta download Pit Bull akan collab dengan AC dengan lagu ni. Tapi sampai sekarang takde pulak dengar. Ala tapi dengan bisnes dia tu 1juta download tu anytime je lah boleh settle. Kan kan kan


Eh

Where were we just now?

Paranoia. Right.

Yesterday night we had a confrontation. I was all geared up to sleep early. Had myself lying on the bed by 1030pm but suddenly I was confronted for being cold this few days. Yes I was cold. Partly preparing myself partly trying to get that other side to be fed up and just leave. Senang cerita tengah saiko diri yang I will be alone after this so you better be prepared not to have anyone to care about what you eat what you do throughout the day.

So aku buat taik je la this few days. Lama la jugak. Satu patah balas satu. Takde gelak besar. Takde mesra. Tapi dia just go on. Sampai malam semalam aku kinda push him to the limit and we had a talk.

Mistakes were made, we cannot undone. Aku just nak some sort of reassurance. Dulu dia pernah bagi that reassurance. But it has been a while since I hear that. Manusia mudah lupa and I was just wondering if he really means it.

Penyudahnya sampai pukul dua baru tidur. Cis betul.

Things are going nowhere no matter how hard I hope. Kun fa ya kun.

I will move on. I will.


March 04, 2015

February 26, 2015

Reput hati

Reput hati. Susah hati. Pedih hati.

To let her go.

Jaga diri sayang. Jangan lupa makngah. Jangan lupa macammana nak baca alfatihah. Dah sendawa baca alhamdulillah.

Makngah sayang Nayli. Sangat-sangat.

Sangat-sangat.

February 25, 2015

Rationalizing sadness

Here we go again..another wave of sadness strikes.

Bila dah nak serik entahlah.

Tapi cukup-cukuplah. They are heading ending, I should really go. But I can't really go when there's too much good thing in this so I must nurture hatred.

How can a guy spend so much time with a girl with no thought that the girl might grow fond of him? He was never my type. But he made me depended on him a lot. When you have someone who cares so much about what you eat, whether you are safe home, your whereabouts. Someone who constantly checks up on you, you woke up to his texts and ended your day also to his texts. How can a guy do all this thing and thought he can keep it casual? I began with having zero feeling but I think right now I kind of in miserable at the thought of him marrying other girl.

But I was the bad one. I knew he was in a long term relationship. I knew I am never his type. Not beautiful enough to leave his long time gf. I was the bad one. I should never expect more from him. Despite his time spent with me albeit having a long time gf. If I have my own lover I wouldn't want him to spend time with other girl too much. I was and I am the bad one.

I have been crying a lot. In my sleep in my prayer. I pray that He shed me some light. Give me strength.I can only cry to Him and ramble in my blog coz I really don't know who should I turn to anymore.

February 24, 2015

That phase..


 I am in the phase where I enjoy going outdoor so much. With the scorching hot weather...quite a bad timing huh? So I went hiking again last Sunday with the team.. It was quite a challenging trail, definitely more challenging than KDCF I would say but something a lil behind Broga because Broga's peak was quite tough I remembered almost getting someone lift up my butt up the rocks wtf.

The trail is somewhat different where you don't get to see views at the peak. The starting of the trail we go up the "entrance"/mukadimah (mukadimah only we sweat buckets already lulz), we were welcomed by the view overlooking the housing area...



Mukadimah of the trail!

Then we started the walk with a wider path..before going to a more knee-pain inducing trail.


The highest peak was actually a flat area..surrounded by trees so you can't really see the view.



All in all it was a good workout. Burned enough calorie to earn me a good plate of nasik lemak after that. Lulz. So much fail.



Looking forward to more hike after this. Bole la join trail run next year kahkah kbai