December 25, 2011

Hello from London!

Greetings, everyone, haro from London!

This trip has been planned since 3rd year.."Nnt final year kita kena gi London, proper2 macam pegi melancong tempat betul2. Selama ni datang makan malaysian hall and shop Oxford st je!" Soooo..the dream has been materialized.

Money is kinda tight but everything has been planned since months ago sooo nak taknak datang je lah..but I've been having good fooood non stop yaw!

I love London! Takde ke sugar daddy nak perempuan simpanan dekat London kahkahjustjokingkthxbai

Hello from London :)

Greetings everyone, haro from London! This trip has been
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December 21, 2011

Deserted desserts

Semalam masuk dapur tengok pisang hampir busuk..nak buang sayang so tetibe *plink* datang idea nak buat pengat pisang. Bukak fridge ada santan tinggal suku tin, ada jagung skett wahh memang cun ler...

Tetengah masak silap bajet gula melaka termanis pulak. Santan dah abis, susu nak jimat buat breakfast sampai jumaat terpaksa la tambah air..jadi dah kurang pekat la pengat gua. Pastu *plink* datang idea lagi kukus pulut makan dengan pengat yang dah berkuah tu since pisang ada sebijik je. Lepastu ada inti cucurbadak 3 hari lepas elok lagi makan dgn pulut bleh la feeling2 pulut panggang..

Idea sangat genius..memang sedap kedua2 makanan itu (puji diri sendiri)

Harini wa kemas2 dapur sekali jumpa 2 bijik pisang hampir busuk blakang langsir and satu tin susu sejat baru bukak belakang tingkap. Rumah ni memang sesuai buat main treasure hunt cari barang tersembunyi. Ah sudahhh..takkan nak kena buat pengat lagi nak suruh wa kena diabetes ke.

Tengah tunggu idea *plink* lagi nak buat apa. Kalau tak ke tongsampah leww..

Wa dah feeling cam mak-mak dah ni masak spontan2 cemni

December 20, 2011


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-----Original Message-----
From: N <>
Date: Mon, 19 Dec 2011 17:05:18
To: <>
Subject: Senang-lenang
Waking up knowing you have free day all along is such a bliss. I think I am much more calmer and happier now despite having the exam around the corner and being left alone in the house. I guess stresses from clinic really defeats exam stress.

I spent my morning doing light and easy things. I was up early but refused to go back to sleep so I browsed the net, played with my camera, tidied up the kitchen a bit and cooked for my lunch. I had sardin and telur goreng for lunch which reminds me of home. Yup, it sucks being alone because I'm paranoid like heck that ghost/robber and whatnot might pop in anytime but the peaceful atmosphere really gave me time to recuperate from all the stresses that accumulated since September.
Recharging my mind, body and soul for the second part of final year : Bismillahirrahmaanirrahim, may everything goes smoothly :)

December 17, 2011

Winter break!!!!

Winter break : commence!


December 14, 2011

Of Radiology And Of Slowly Becoming A Psychotic

Twice in 10 weeks, I'll be doing a rotation in the radiology department. What we did was mainly learning how to take a radiograph/xray (how to position it etc) and how to interpret the radiograph.

Since 3rd year, I've been witnessing seniors being what I used to think as a 'torture' whenever they are interpreting the radiograph..coz we have this one doctor who will be questioning us all sorts of stuff from A-Z..what crossed my mind at that time was I'll be definitely dead when I'm in the dept. The doctor is very well-known and is one of the best in oral radiology I must say.

Come 4th year..I only got like 3/4 chances to be in the dept. And I really didn't quite grasp the 'subject' yet. To master radiology I think you must first master your anatomy. One thing you should know nadzirah and anatomy doesn't really blend well.. But I got away in 4th year because most of the time there are 3 of us doing the rotation so I can always dodge the question and pass it to my partners..

Now that I'm a fifth year I realized that I need to stop running away from my disguise towards anatomy and start to face it. I tried to spend the night before the rotation trying to revise so I will look more of like a fifth year in front of him (the doctor).

Today I was alone in the dept. My partner was sick. I thought to myself that this is it. This is the time to face my 'fear'.

So there I was spending my 3 hours taking tonnes of radiographs and interpreting them one by one with him. I must say that was one of the best moments ever because it was kinda like a one to one tutorial and I learned a lot of stuff. The best thing was I managed to answer most of his braincracking questions although of course..there were few silly mistakes here and there (like what comes after 1? I answered 10. Lol it's 2 you bimbo!)

The tiredness of going to and fro taking r/g for 9-10 patients and going 3 hours without sitting paid off when he finally gave me an 'Excellent' remark. Other people might think it isn't a big deal but to me it is because I never got one from him. It was such a good feeling because I finally managed to impress him..although I think I should work on my confidence more because I kept on doubting myself eventho my answers are correct.

So that's how my Tuesday went by. 3 more days to go and I think I've started to losing my sanity. I became tired really easily, I became mad really reaaaaaaally easy. It's SAD (seasonal affective disorder) and pre exam stress disorder combined and I tell you it's a really really ugly condition..
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December 13, 2011


"I've seen you did a work, a lot better than this. I know you all are exhausted. Get your christmas break, come back and refocus"

My supervisor, quoted. I was doing a filling today. I can't deny it, honestly I'm really really tired. 3 months has passed since we started clinics and we've been working our arses off day in day out.
We dealt with a lot of disappointments and we had to come and pretend we are strong the next day. Penat okay nak motivate diri sendiri untuk bertahan. Lagi penat bila kawan sekeliling kehidupan bahagia je..rasa macam nakkk je join berhoohaa sini sana tapi kau tau kau tak sama macam mereka.. Jadi kau pujuk hati kata takpe..bertabah..this is for the better.

Winter break in 4 days. I know I have to spend most of them studying for the finals. Tapi it's a big relief waking up knowing you don't have to see or treat a patient. Bukan tak suka, cuma penatlah sikit. I soooo need a break :)
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December 12, 2011


Wasted my weekend being unwell. Was down with diarrhoea since yesterday. At first I thought it was just a normal physiological process when I eat a little more than usual that Friday nite. It turned out, I was passing out everything that I ate yesterday. The climax point was when I woke up at 5 this morning with severe stomach cramp that felt even worse than a menstrual pain.

After 2 cups of sugarless tea and 2 capsules of Arret, I managed to get fully get out of bed, shower, and cooked something to eat. Fried the kuetiow but my appetite suddenly just disappeared even though I have been craving for kuetiow for a while.

So I turned to my fav dish when I'm unwell - chicken porridge.

There goes my weekend :(

December 11, 2011

Bad habit

I have a very bad habit whereby when I'm mad at somebody I can't see their faces until my heart cools down. I can't talk can't reply to them until I think I'm okay.

December 08, 2011

Jumps up and down, and move it all around

Dah siap dah logbooooooooook. Oh weeee!

Now let's concentrate on the exam. Hwarghhhhhhhhhh

December 06, 2011

Tak senang

Tak senang bila hidup sorang
Tak senang bila semua riang kau sorang yang kelam
Tak senang bila hidup sorang
Tak senang bila keperitan itu kau sorang yang faham

May what doesn't kill me, makes me stronger

December 05, 2011

My kind of Sunday :)

Scrubs - ironed

Room - slightly tidied :P
Laundry done

Watching my favourite show - Running Man

Stayed in my own world. It's quiet and lonely, but it definitely suits my current mood.
I love my Sunday :D

December 04, 2011

Tak stabil

Study malas
Jumpe org malas
Buat keje malas
Makan banyak
Dengar berita ni emo
Tahu pasal tu emo

Hoih hormone cecepat lew stabil
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December 03, 2011

Cameraku sayang

I lost my precious camera in the dental hospital a week ago. My friend borrowed it from me and I thought it was still somewhere around the hospital, but it doesn't seem like it is anymore.

That precious has been with me since 2009. We've traveled to Amsterdam, Austria, Czech Rep, Spore, Indonesia and Germany together.
I need a new camera for school (patient's picture) etc and to capture my memory of what hopefully to be one of my last moments here but I'm just too deadbroke right now. Can't afford to buy a new one..looked up in the internet a decent one would cost me around 180eu. If only I had money..

Sedihnye :(
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December 01, 2011


Forgive me if these days my posts seemed so whiny. Mcm tak bersyukur pulak but trust me I do. Dari saat dapat tawaran JPA sampai la ke sekarang saya bersyukur sangat2 dengan apa yg saya ada. Cuma tu lah cuma nak mengadu nasib kat belog (walaupun ntah ada tah tal yg baca)

So this morning was my last visit to paeds clinic in Dillons Cross. It was one heck of a tough morning to get up and get done. I was sleepy, I was tired and I really felt like just escaping but I managed to get out from the house at 8. Lo and behold, halfway thru the journey the bus driver told us there was an accident at the clinic area and they had to divert to another road?

So what does that means? That means we have to walk up the hill, the kinda steep hill to get to the clinic. It was the longest 15 mins I ever had, berpeluh-peluh gua dikala pagi yg sejuk menggigit tulang!

Jadi..begitulah sedikit sbyk hari saya. Esok pagi takde patient tp kena datang jugak hosp pagi tu ada kerja nak siapkan.

Akhir-akhir ni dgn gabungan kerja bersama patient makin menimbun, exam makin dekat dan cuaca makin buruk perlahan-lahan membunuh saya dari dalam. Ya Allah, pls give me strength..