I love you 356354

This is a tribute to the one that has been with me for the past 7 years. 

We've been together since I started working. For 2 years, it brought me safely through 323km journey South to East and 323km East to South safely, regardless of the time. 2am, 3am, 4am, 5am, just name it. Ulang alik JB-KL-JB Pontian-KL-Pontian. Ulang alik Pontian JB. It has traveled to all the states in the Peninsular. Be it solo trip, or with companies. 

It has been the witness of the stories of my life. Tempat mendengar keluhan tentang kehidupan. Tempat menadah setiap airmata setiap kali dikecewakan. Yang jadi saksi insan-insan yang pernah hadir dalam hidup. 

You are a very reliable companion and I thank you for all these years we've been together. On your last day, we already traveled 356354km. 

Thank you, and goodbye. 

Sedang Cuba Bertahan

I had kind of a major breakdown on Friday night that I ended up crying for almost an hour.  I felt like I was at the lowest of the lowest point of my life. The next day I woke up, I tried to gather myself and be strong. Thank God I had to attend a program so I had my mind taken off for a while.

On Sunday I received another devastating news. Kinda feel like the whole world crashing down on me. I mean...I'm already feeling that it would be easier if my life ends now so I won't be hear another things that would break my heart. But I held on. Tried to gather every positive aura that would keep me going.

I'm trying to accept there are things we can't control in life. That things happen. Things change. And everything is temporary. Even our lives. There are reasons why things happen. And that God wouldn't put us through tests if we can't handle it.

Cuma perlu bertahan. Just keep going. 

I am sad

It has been a hectic week, juggling with my tumbling and unstable emotions, as well as managing work. My team went for the nationals and managed to secure the highest band, Alhamdulillah eventhough we didnt make it to the top 20. A little bit of mixed emotion there but I would just leave it as it is. Soal rezeki, ada nanti ada lah.

Aside from that I am fighting with my feelings. It has been a very tiring week especially emotionally. Things might have been getting better, or at least the intense phase has passed but it still feels empty.

To make this week a complete series of sad things, I have confirmed my suspicions that  my best friend of work is resigning. I mean...I have already broke down a few times this week. I cried to sleep. I cried on the way to work. This news is another cry-worthy thing but I am physically so exhausted I had to resort to another way of expressing my sadness. However, she's leaving for the sake of her family and the fact that this place might not suit her need. It is pretty tiring this days with overflow of patients. I had to excuse myself from seeing patients for this few days but I'm always feeling guilty doing so knowing how tiring would it be for them to work without another 1 manpower. It must be hard for them. Anyway... I should make peace with the fact that she's leaving because it is for her happiness.

I hope with a few tasks and events already completed by this week, things would be better. I am just tired mentally, physically and emotionally. I already let go a few locum sessions eventhough this is the hardest month for me, financially. Might need to take out my savings di hari tua. Harap ada rezeki lain nanti :(

Konniciwa!

One of my wishlist this includes traveling abroad. After months of planning, I finally hopped on the plane to the land of rising sun - Japan!

The planning started since January before I got busy with KIK and other things. I kinda had things booked and planned by then. Actually I was on another mission which was to watch Ireland playing Rugby World Cup..and the journey to securing a ticket was one heck of a nervewrecking journey. Thank God it was worth it.

I restructured my plans about 2 months before going when I found out about Klook. Klook really came in handy when it comes to travelling I would recommend everyone to use it!


Reached Haneda Airport and spent a night at Henn Na Haneda Hotel.  A nice,cosy hotel which had automatic machine for reception. Bilik dia siap ada steamer cum deodorizer cum iron i is kagum hokay!

 The next day I travelled to Shinjuku to my 2nd hotel - Citadine Central Shinjuku to leave my luggages. I was lucky they allowed early check in at around 12 so I had time to have lunch, and settle my Zohor and Asar before going to the stadium. Sempat la jalan around Shinjuku since we arrived the city quite early. The hotel is just nice, a little bigger compared to Henn Na Haneda Hotel. Walking distance to Shinjuku busy places.


Took around 1 hour to reach Yokohama from Shinjuku. The train was jam-packed in Yokohama. When I reached the stadium..it was surreal. Rasa nak nangis pun ada but mostly I was grinning ear-to-ear la. What made it sweeter was Ireland won against Scotland with bonus point. Took a train back to Shinjuku and had dinner at Kebab-ya (6ooyen) before I called it a day.

Arrived International Yokohama Stadium

Enjoying the view

The next day I travelled around Tokyo. Asakusa, Akihabara, Shibuya. Japan is a nice country. Had a little feeling of Europe but...Asian. Haa kau faham tak. Entah tak tahu susah camne nak explain la. Had Coco-Ichibanya's chicken curry for lunch which was super yum and very generous portion (for 1180yen) and Gyumon for dinner (3000yen)

Asakusa

Akihabara

Asakusa

Shibuya

Shinjuku

Coco icibanya chicken cutlet curry sedap nak mati

Gyumon for wagyu

The next day I took a 2.5h bus ride to Lake Kawaguchiko to experience Mount Fuji. There are certain recommended times to actually witness the whole of Mount Fuji, and I actually get to see one on the way but I thought it would remain that way but as I arrived, the dark clouds start to parade around Mount Fuji and covered the top. A little bit frustrated so I took earlier bus back to Tokyo. Checked-in at APA Ginza Kyobashi Hotel since it's just a walking distance to Tokyo Station. Smallest hotel compared the ones I've been to Haneda and Shinjuku and the bed is too soft. Nasib la duduk kejap je.

Matcha x Vanilla ice cream in front of covered-peak Mount Fuji!

Saviour! Kembara Meals so you can eat warm meal anywhere, anytime!

The next day I took Shinkansen (Japanese bullet train) from Tokyo to Kyoto. Kyoto gives me a little bit of Aussie vibe for some reason. That's what unique about Japan. One country but each city gives different feelings. Just stopped by to go to Arashiyama Bamboo Forest, Nishiki Market, had lunch at Ayam-ya for their ramen (980yen+onsen tak ingat berapa) and took train to Osaka.

Arashiyama Bamboo Forest

Pickles at Nishiki Market

Seafood at Nishiki Market

Ayam-ya Spicy Ramen

Arrived Osaka and proceeded to my next accomodation - S.Training Center Osaka. A little bit distant from Osaka Station. And they were strict with the 4pm check-in so I did my laundry while waiting. Checked-in, showered and bersiap untuk keluar. They have shuttle from the hotel to Osaka Station every 20 mins but until 9pm. Malam tu dah keluar balik lambat terpaksa menapak.

I had the Osaka Amazing Pass but since a little bit tight with time, did not get to utilize the pass fully. Malam tu makan halal takoyaki at Namba shopping area - nama kedai Creo-Yu kalau tak silap (680yen) and shopping dekat favourite place ever in japan - Don Quijote :D

Tempozan Ferris Wheel

Shinsaibashi Shopping street

The last day, brought my luggages and left it at Namba Station since I'm taking the Nankai Line Express to the airport later. Went to Matsuri for lunch. Sedap gila okonomiyaki dia woiii. Sushi macam so-so je. Strolled around Namba and Shinsaibashi for last minute shopping. Flew out from Kansai International Airport. 

Fried Curry Rice

Okonomiyakisedapnakmati

A plate of various suhi

Telurgulunglupanama

Mochi

Maka berakhirlah trip Japan kali ini. Very tight schedule. I think one day I'm going to return to Japan untuk trip yang lebih tenang. Gagahkan juga buat post kalini sebagai kenang-kenangan :)

A weird.....MISSION?

At one point of my life where I seem to be left behind my other friends, I actually have a wish to resign from their life. Like, withdraw, cut connection, and go on silent mode. In fact, I have started to do to a few. And honestly, it didn't affect our lives that much tho - cause you learn to adapt.


There are a few exceptions that i’ll have to make tho. Like Fuzah...she is one of the people who I’d like to be there for her for the rest of my life. And Wani too, as well as Ayu. And Wany too.


Memories will remain. Dark pasts perhaps will be put aside one day. But for now, goodbye to new memories 😊

Updatesssssss

Hoih lamanya tak menulis. Taktau apa nak tulis dah pun.

I tried to post a few times, tapi berhenti separuh jalan for some reasons.

Anywayssss, updates :

Had my 1st task as facilitator done, Alhamdulillah I would say job done okay kot? I mean we were given tiny tiny time to execute the task and managed to get some awards so I'd say that's not too bad eh? Although, it was just a mini convention and we still have the regional and (hopefully) the national to go but at least first, huge step is done. Lepas menang ada cakap-cakap tak best here and there I'm glad I took a leave right after the convention so I wasn't in a stressful place to receive the news. So I am able to give lesser feck to the news although of course, I'm hurt by what I heard.


Also there are few occasions that I feel like resigning from this place. Ada a few things that make me unhappy and my career progression seems to be on plateau phase when I'm here. However there are loads and loads of things to love about this place. It brought me to places and things that I wouldn't do by myself. I love working with most of the people here (most not all ye :P) Plus, I get to involve with sports activities which I am always excited about. So at the moment these things are keeping me from leaving this place.


Other than that same 'ol same 'ol life. We are already in Ramadhan which I think to me, quite fast. Talk about Ramadhan where we are supposed to memberi kemaafan and such there is certain someone that although I already make peace with what happen, but still couldn't given kemaafan until today. Talk about having grudges eh? Taklah, I mean, I'm okay I'm fine, but I just couldn't bring myself to forgive, just yet. And this is not something that I can change by listening to advices seperti janganlah kita berdendam atau sentiasa memaafkan orang but let this be one stubborn thing that I'd like to hold onto for as long as I want okay? 

I

Moving On

 

You can say I'm quite a loyal person to my things. I get attached a little too much that I still have momentos from primary school to high school to uni years with me. 

However I think this year moving on should be my theme. Those stuffs have been collecting dusts one day I must find courage to toss away whatever that's not needed.

This new year I bid goodbye to my loyal financial tracker. It has been with me since the day I started working in Pontian. I tracked all my money in and out everymonth. This little book has all my travelling expenses details and all and it has survived air tertumpah, hujan dan panas and finally pieces of the paper started to be separated.

Initially I planned to transfer all the old details into my new little book because sometimes I do look at old expenses for reference. But then I realized, this is it, it's time to move on. I can still flick through the old little book should I need any reference but I don't need to bring the old details into thw new little book.

So goodbye old little book. You served me well. Thanks for all the memories.

Here's to the year of moving on and starting anew 😌