Cari Gado

I have been eating like crazy this week. Got frustrated over little things. Got a lil too emotional over certain things. And very fidgety to cari gaduh. Kalau dulu rasa macam there are a lot of things I can try to cari gaduh, but now...not quite.

I have been slightly bitchy last Thursday with someone. The other side noticed until he said "apa yang you tak puas hati ni meh la cakap" Kahkahkah. I kept on avoiding the question. So I think he kinda guessed already that I'm around that tine of the month.

Still in the mood to cari gado, I just blurted out to him to which he replied as below. Kahkahkah. Be careful with what you wished for okay!

Planning isn't my forte anymore :(

Last 2 weeks have been one of the most hectic weeks I had. I was kind of busy with stuff at work and I was down with cough and cold. And I had another big task which is planning for Wani's bachelorette partayy. All this combined has put me under big pressure. 

Tried my best to settle the major task. Place, cake, decorations. But problems kept on coming in and out until that very Saturday when we are supposed to meet. I was still unwell that Saturday. Received a not so good news that morning. I had to go to work. After work  I rushed to buy groceries and rushed home to prepare roti daging and baked macaroni for the partay because I was afraid there won't be any food. I was so exhausted and a lil bit disappointed with myself I felt I did not do my job well :/

That evening I just couldn't handle it anymore and then came superman to console me. Initially I was all okay...we went to grab a bite, chit chat but when I was sent home, I teared a bit. I tried to hide my tears but superman found out anyway kahkah hilang macho. Felt better when I let it out. Takde apa pun maybe I was just too tired and was still unwell. 

That night we went to Regalia with whoever that could make it. Had some catching up, main urut-urut and I was down by 3am. 

 Alhamdulillah, the partay went okay walaupun macam taktau pun apa nak buat. Cake turned out great. Food was adequate. And I was just so happy I get to meet them girls. Hope the celebrated person felt happy despite all the defects and the fact that the event was very not smooth. Takde games. Takde saprais. Sigh. I knew I could do better if I wasn't unwell and wasn't too caught up with stuff at work :(

Slow day

What a slow day at work.

And I'm still not at my top condition. Tak apalah. Sakit penghapus dosa-dosa kecil kan. Berlambak dosa tu lagi nak carry at least yang kecil-kecil dah hapus ni okaylah kot. But I do hope I gain my 100% recovery soon. Pagi-pagi bangun with cracked lips, stuffy nose. Feeling nausea the whole day. Very the unpleasant one.

For some reason I'm feeling...empty. Taktaulah kenapa. Haish. Rasa macam empty gila hidup ni. Like I don't have any new achievements so far. Takdak progress. In any aspect of life. Tatau la kenapa dilanda perasaan begini.

Maybe I do need a break. :/


and...this came in suddenly while I was writing this post. Haha so random. Tebiat agaknya. Well slow day at work, slow day with someone also today so it's a nice little gesture that made me smile :)

Unwell

I have been unwell for this past few days. Feverish at night. Cough and flu. Started last Thursday and starting yesterday it got slightly worse so I went to see the doctor to get my blood checked. I have been relying on warm honey lemon water this past few days with occasional PCM when I feel the headache got a lil bit too intense and my body temp increases. Blood checked - platelet was a bit low and I was given MC today.

But I know what I needed more.


Told somebody ;
  "tak sempat jumpa haritu memang sedih, tapi sedih lagi sakit takde tempat bermanja" 

Ngahngahngah cheesy terok. My apologies. Orang tengah sakit memang mengada-ngada extra. Plus I don't know how much longer I can have time like this with him..... At first I thought he couldn't make it because he had to be somewhere so daku pasrah. But he said he'll make adjustments and he did.

As I entered the car he said "ini muka sakit ke..macam sihat jee.." kahkah kurang asam orang dah pening peluh-peluh dia apa tau. And he followed by "Haritu marah kat I ye malam tu tak sempat jumpa. Comel je dah pandai marah kat I sekarang"
Alhamdulillah. Ada gak orang rasa yang iols marah ni comel satu dalam seribu ni mana nak cari orang tenang camni. Ini kalau orang lain ni mau perang silent treatment berjam-jam. Kahkah.

Initially we wanted to go for lunch and then he'll leave for work. But I ended up following him for work sebab pusing-pusing cari tempat nak lunch tak jumpa. Had to rest somewhere kejap sementara tunggu but I didn't mind.

Weed. Marijuana. PCM :P

Tentang Dia

Walau setinggi gunung mana harapan, yang Maha membuat keputusan hanya Dia.

But this simple paragraph best described how I feel.

Caring

He is the kind of guy who has a very kind, caring and protective heart. I used to like him since long long time ago but at one point I knew that we cannot go more then just friends.

For some reasons I avoided him that one time. Feeling some kind of guilt and kinda missing having a go-to person like before I tried to rekindle our friendship.

Still the same guy who would make sure I'm safe inside the house before he leaves everytime he sends me home. I was kinda unwell today and was coughing like crazy when he came to my workplace to send something and he immediately told me to get it checked and get an MC. I told him about a guy who have been bugging me and out of 3 guys I shared the story with, he was the only one whi suggested punching the guy. Although, other person, of course has been checking on me almost everyday asking me whether he's still bugging me or not. Kihkih.


Entah kenapa tonight I felt like writing about him. May Allah blesses his soul and ease his way in whatever problems he is having. I genuinely sayang him and wouldn't want him to get hurt because he has such a kind heart. May Allah guides him to the right path. With all my heart, I really hope he gets the happiness that he deserves.

A costly mistake

It was quite late that night. I just got back from Zawara Bukit Jelutong because I was craving for Churros. Went there after my night job. Had a cup of coffee which I don't usually do except if I need to workout. I was quite tired.

Right after Hicom exit I sped a little bit like I usually do. Saw the motorcycle already but in a split second I heard a loud bang. Feck. 

So I hit a motorcycle, yet again. Thank God he was not harmed. I really didn't see that coming at all. I had my signal. Entahlah up until now I still think it wasn't 100% my fault. I got out my car. Another 3 motorcylists helped the guy out. I kept on apologizing to the guy. He was reluctant to see my face or tell me what he wanted. I was alone. Almost broke down into tears and finally we exchanged numbers and the guy let me drive home that night. 

I reached home and he called. He was calmer. Told him I'll pay for the damage. Went to shower, and he called again. Started to have weird feeling and I put my guard up. He asked me where do I live bla bla and the last question - "dah kawen ke" to which I immediately replied "dah" without thinking long. Kahkah. I heard him saying "ala..dah kawen pulak" This is the second time I hit a motorcycle and both times also the guys ended up being weird. Maybe I should tone down my apologetic face, but I needed something to calm them after causing problem to them aite? 

The mistake costed me almost 500. Takpelah ada la tu mana-mana gaji tak berkat tu. Iols redha dan pasrah.