Denial

First of all, this - 

is my happiness today. Unfortunately this is the only positive thing I can dig in for today.

So yeah this is my source of happiness that came all over from the other side of the world. Even though I think I took one size larger but I'm still a happy camper.


My mind still wonders around the house. The termites problem is getting quite big and I'm so itchy to get rid of it but I need to clear up the house first. Aih perangai tak sabar mula berleluasa biasa dia ni! I will do the cleaning slowly, one by one. Sebab bajet pun tak berapa nak ada apa-apa yang reti buat sendiri, I will do it. If only I know how to repair the toilet flush and sink.....


I'm sorry, whoever is reading this post (kalau ade lah), at this point you can just shut it off because this is the point where I start rambling..














Next thing I need to get over the denial stage and be in the acceptance mode already.  There are few issues that I have in my chest that I would like to let it out straight to the person but I need to hold back, turn around and walk away. Selama ni ada yang tak puas hati mesti eventually akan terluah jugak but this time around, I need to just fuck it off. But aku tau perangai aku ni selagi terbuku didada I will keep bringing it up, on and on again in the blog.

I think despite all the ketakpuashatian and whatnot, I am actually missing the good ol times. It's like taking out something that has been a part of me for the past years and I feel empty, and rindu. But rindu is not a good thing to feel so I am forcing it to become hatred. Unfortunately I did not manage to do it.

From the best of buddy to somebody I used to know? I don't know. Only time will tell.