MAKING DECISION

..is my weakest point.

I hate to do one.

But I have to make one.

But I don't know.

When at one point I'm quite sure with what I've decided, my paranoia strikes and drags me to the whole starting thinking point again.

Teary Eyes

I promised my atoks I'm going back to Muar before I go. Time is running out so the last Merdeka holiday was the most appropriate time to do so...
After lots of thinking, 2 hours after I reached home from the shopping outing, I told mak "Jom balik kampung"

And after 3 pit stops (Projet Bkt Saga/Seremban R&R/Tangkak Tol Plaza) and 130-140-150km/h later..we reached Muar safe and sound.
I saw Cik Aris (mom's bro) at his favourite spot and to my surprise, my atok haron wasn't in his bed yet. My atok pisah wasn't even back at home coz she was busy MEREWANG (sape tatau maksud gi usaha gigih tanye org) at a neighour's home. Unload our bags (eleh stakal 2 ketul je) and checked out our rooms (we have 6 extended rooms for the anak cucu).
30 minutes later, I heard a very cute voice shouting out in surprise

"ehhhhh...ni sapa yang balik niiiiii!!!!"

I knew that cute voice.
I recognised that petite figure.
It was my atok pisah!
And the rest was history. Spent a nite there. Had breakfast. Learned how to cook sambal udang and helped mom to cook.
We told my atoks that my flight might be on 16th september. Tok Haron looked quite dissapointed. Problem is..it's Ramadhan. And with the terawih and the fact that he can't travel much during Ramadhan due to his gastric problem..it's quite impossible for him to send me off at KLIA. Mom had told me earlier. Expect nothing. They are not going to be there.
Tok said "kalau ade org bawak btul2 ye boleh aje" (means if the arrangements of sending him to KLIA and back to Muar is smooth and possible, he would have no problem sending me off)
But being a nice and understanding daughter, mak told tok that It's okay if they couldn't make it.
The last moment there, I hugged tok pisah and cried. And her eyes were quite reddish too. Made me cried more terrible la of course. Salam my atok haron and again, cried.

It's damn saddening =(

AlFatihah

AlFatihah to my Tok Busu (male) who passed away today due to heart failure.

Mom and I went to Keramat for the last rites.
Since I need to get a doctor's consent for my medical report, mom decided to meet Dr Khairat, our neighbour back in Keramat. So it was like strolling down the memory lane as we passed through the area. I realised that my paternal family used to reside near to each other..Keramat - AU - Bukit Keramat.. and I just realised how close I am to the heart of Kuala Lumpur had I stayed and grew up in Bukit Keramat.
How would I be?
Am I going to be culturally/socially conditioned just the same like I am now?

But one thing for sure I'll be more immuned to disastrous traffic congestion and public transport.
But health-wise might be the same. Here in Shah Alam I've been inhaling factory's smoke while in Bkt Keramat I might have to breath in the road construction dust etc etc..


People might go "eleh Shah Alam ngan KL...ape sgt la beza dier...."
But for me..there are differences.

Whatever it is, Selamat Menyambut Hari Kemerdekaan Malaysia!
50 years passed by but we have another long long way to go....
For the time being I may not be able to express my love towards Malaysia physically. But come back another 50 years (insyaAllah kalau nenet umur 70 thun idup lagi T_T) I hope my presence would be more significant towards Malaysia's development.
Ape ni smangat merdeka?? Sukehatilaaaaaaaaa ~


Malaysian U-23 rocks! Yeah! Such a wonderful present for our Independent Day!

I hear your name in certain circles
And it always makes me smile
I spend my time thinking about you
and it's almost driving me wild
And there's a heart that's breaking
down this long distance line tonight

- Missing You, Tina Turner-

Muncung tirus

Karaoke #1A photo proof that I'm terribly sunburn. Tgkp gmbr pun tak nmpk
Penghayatan 100%

Muncung tirus comeback.Minus Ayu. Mane Ayu?!?!!?

Karaoke#2

Okay baru nampak sket muke
We went in because Wani was so excited the room was so cute n beautiful!!!

The Story

9.23 am = Woke up. Opened my eyes. Freaked out. Texted Wani.

Waniiiiiiii...aku baru bgn!!!!!!!!!

Called her. Bedek bedek....confirmed! Cycling -> CANCEL. My badddd...

Wani came to my house (sorry babe. 2 kali udah cancel itu basikal). Crapped around. Went to Intec to fetch Fuzah. Went to Post Office in Sect 3 to pay some bills (Wani's). Oh ye..Another history is created today. Wani made her own bill payment for the first time today! *clap clap clap*

Bill payments settled. Where to go? Karaoke!!!!!
Ohh...suddenly remembered. My friend yg keje kat 'o briens tu is going to resign this Saturday. Since I've promised her to drop by anytime, today is the only chance left to watch her membanting tulang empat kerat di o briens. So yeah, promised them that we'll come by The Curve for only few hours. Arrived at 'O Briens The Curve. Kedai gila exclusive segan nak masuk. Finally gathered some strength to step in. Ordered...errr...apekah sandwich itu terlupa.
Hohoho thanx for the discount Nab! Then left TC for Summit

Reached Summit. Zohor prayer. Destination karaoke #1. erkss forgot the name but the place is slightly bigger that the previous place. Sang 10 songs. Name it. Dangdut? Pop? Asli? Jiwang? Sentimental? We've managed to sumbangkan the songs whole-heartedly. On the way out, seduced by destination karaoke #2. Since it was quite early, so yeah, y don't we go for another 3 songs.

Left Summit. Had diluncht (lunch+dinner+tea) at Mapley in front of my house.

All in all,

HAPPY!

And I really need the happiness since tomorrow I'm stuck 9.30am-10pm in the building!

SehariMenjadiGadisBersosial? Gangtarz?

9.00 pm - Wani texted me => "wey ko smp kul bp? aku da smgt2 da ni.hahaha"

12.30 pm - texted Megat (Yatie's friend) and Sou about the tix

12.50 pm - arrived at Wani's house. had some decision making and planning things session.

1.30 pm - departed from Wani's to stadium. surveyed the parking area and yada yada bla bla

2.00 pm - arrived at my house. crapped around from 2 pm onwards until....

5.30 pm - *panicked* "Wani baju ni ok ke???????" "Wani cepat mandi!!!!!!!!!!!" "Weyhhhhh cpatttt....mane eyeliner..!!!!" "Wey mane plak eyeliner ZA aku niiiiiiiiiiiiii"

6.30 pm - panic situation continued. *nervous*

7.25 pm - Maghrib prayer! go! go! go!

7.30 pm - Megat called

7.35 pm - Tudung akuuuuuuuuu........

7.45 pm - Departed from my house. Stopped by at Compact Living Store to buy batteries and mineral water

8.05 pm - Megat called again

8.08 pm - arrived at the carpark entrance.
Din : eh...laaaa...kaaa-uuuuuuu
Me : eh....kaa-uuuuuuu
Din : Laaa...u pun datang. dahlah dahlah..takyah bayar. masuk je. wey..kete ni da bayar (shouted to his friends)
Me : Weee...thanks eh din~

Note : Din was my colleague in Chi Dim Sum Cafe. But he came 2-3 weeks before I resigned. Since I had disengaged myself from the place and also the people, so I haven't seen him since last year? Din is one funny, pleasant looking guy. And yes, I used to &^%$#%^&* (fill in any suitable words here) with him. But things didn't went far due to some circumstances. Apekah ia? Biarlah rahsia...lalala~ I was so happy to see him again. But didn't get the chance to talk with him more. Anyway Din was collecting the parking tix at the Stadium's entrance and yeah, lucky me I got through FOC! Thanks Din~~

8.14 pm - Called Megat.
Me : I dah sampai. u kat entrance mane?
Megat : I kat tepi2 surau ni
Me : oh. i pun kat area2 surau ni. tak nampak pun
Megat : oh eh? u kat mane
Me : kat tepi motosikal (gile nervous. merapu gler jawab)

Wani realised a group of guys in front of the surau. One of them was waving his hand. *nervous lagik* giler ramai makhluk lelaki?!?!?!?!

8.20 pm - Got the tix. Seriously, I am not really good in first time meeting (kalau blind dates mmg sure fail!) I was so nervous. pemalu gler~~

8.30 pm - Gangstarz started.
Since we were wearing hijab, rase ade sedikit keseganan untuk berdansa. But of course lah tak tahan.......at times I surrendered to the chicky songs jua...~

11.15 pm - Gangstarz ended. Made our way out

11.30 pm - Made crazy decision - "Wani, jom jalan2 kat kl malam2 tgk pemandangan"

11.35 pm - texted Megat. thanked him. he asked us to join the infin gang at hakim sect 7

11.45 pm - made a U-turn at pj. went back to shah alam - hakim

12.00 am - arrived at hakim. erkssss....where are them? tsk. i guess we got the wrong place. alang2 dah sampai. lepak je lah sini

1.00 am - departed from hakim. suddenly i saw the gang at the other corner of the restaurant. citttttt....ingat kat maner lah tadiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. by the way didn't stop by since we were too tired. blah saje

1.30 am - arrived at home

many thanks to them who contributed towards the SehariMenjadiGadisBersosial program.

Sou - thanks tho I didn't get to meet u.
Megat - for the tix
Yatie - for introducing Megat
Din - for the FOC parking entrance
Wani - for everything

Mak - for the permission

P/S : INFINATEZ rawked! Tho they didn't get the USD100,000 , they proved that they deserved to be at the finals! I bet they finish up their perjuangan with pride and dignity. Walaweyyyy

Breathing Again

I'm finally breathing normally, and happily again.

Life is wonderful, and it is wonderful-er when u have bunch of amazing people around u. Thanks to all of them (including you, readers -(bajet glamer lah tu)) I'm so happy with my life right now.

I think I'm falling in love miserably with the nature. Gue kini udah jadi ala2 pencinta alam gitu...Yesterday, thanks to Wani, I found solacement *again* after spending 60 minutes cycling in Bukit Cerakah. Syahir (not u,curlymon =P) called me a basikal-maniac but hecccckkkkkk biarlah, I am so into basikal right now.

But today the devil inside my body arose and forced me to give up jogging this morning. Apparently Wani who had the same devil within her agreed to my suggestion. Cissss....terkumpul lagi kalori gue hari ini!

After a capati and a mouthful of secret recipe egg, we finally departed from my home to Mid Val. Earlier in the morning Daud Comel (ketul) texted me. Coincidentally Affan and him wanted to meet up - lepak2 at Mid Val, so yeah, we made a deal. Aprox at 12++ the guys came and we went to Mc D (yeahhh...McD....calories...fats....carbs...erghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh) and chit chatted for about 2-3 hours??

The oh-so-dedicated teachers. ilebiu!!!

Old memories were reopened. Silly moments, stupid acts were reviewed and I could not deny that I'm missing them like...hell-o kitty. We laughed our heart out, had some quiet *terkedu* moment when we realised how we missed each other so much. But I know, we have to move on. And I don't think all of them are feeling the same too. Pity Affan who repeatedly announces his kerinduan towards the moments.

Us girls in uniforms...ngeeee

And the same, old, *yawn* question being asked. Taknak reunion ke? Truth be told, after the 1st attempt of reunion somewhere back in 2006 (ke?) I have lost my interest towards gathering and any sorts of reunion, especially when some of them are still holding onto that macho-konon-kami-macam-best attitude. So stupid, sangat menyedehkan *cries*. I think the next best time to do a reunion is like..5-10 years later. When all of us are matured enough and know how to behave ourselves. Bak kate affan "style dohhh..nanti dah besar aku bawak anak aku ke....aku nak je anak aku gi kat amy pastu ejek - 'MARJANG!" And Daud backfired Affan "hah yelah...nanti anak amy plak gi kat ko cakap - 'FOI!"

Us girls meronggeng

Apart from that, I've also lost interest towards meeting those faces who used to be my best of friends. Although my anger towards Peja is deteriorating, and my communication problem with Ai is improving, I don't think I could handle the pain that kills me from within - pergh ultra jiwang~

Them rugby boys

Anyway anyhoooss, I am looking forward for some casual get-together with my batchmates. IF I'm lucky and Allah has decided to give me chance to further my study to Ireland this year, I really, really really really really wanna meet them. And not to forget my overseas friends. Wherever u are, whatever u do..Saye rindu kamoo~

Them naughty boys

P/S : Thanx a gazillion to Cek Sou for the tix. What tix? Tunggggguuuuu.....

The Moment of Truth

I've been saving the draft for this post since Friday but thanks to the stupid,malicious virus and spyware, I had to spend my time reading on how to get rid of them..Apparently my dear laptop has been attacked by a few viruses, to name a few- BDS/Lovematch (whattheheck?), BackdoorRJump (since forever), kernel88, the confusing cvchost or dll32 and whatsnot, adding to the long list of preexistence-i'm-not-sure-whether-they've-been-deleted-or-not Brontok and RavmonE. I think my laptop is seriously like a rotten, decaying tooth who keeps on receiving supplies of sweets and sugar, making it vulnerable to more and more bacterial infections. *sigh, now do I sound like a real dentist?

Back to the topic which makes my title relevant, we (me + McB friends) are now in the Moment of Truth.What have been told by our previous seniors, the nightmares, the incubi of IB are becoming real day by day. The days coming by are nerve-wracking (it's a correct spelling-go check the dictionary) and stream of tears keeps on lining the powdered/makeup-ed (or madeup? ergh whatever) faces thus decolouring the eyeliners. No, I'm not talking about getting a water-resistance makeups nor boxes of Premier tissue. I'm telling u the consequences of not putting your best in your efforts and the role of luck and taqdir, and keeping strong faith with Allah sw.t.

Rejection, dejection, difficulties are all tests and challenges to turn us into better person. Once we survived from the rainy days, we are naturally selected for living our life and keep on chasing our dreams. However, being the natural-sensitive me, I cant help from feeling sympathy when I see those who used to be so tough broke down easily during the hardships. It is even sadder when the condition of one's life (ie ; money, health) restrict 'em from getting what they want. Having said/saw all this, I am grateful that the journey of my life can still be considered as fortunate altho at times, difficulties and the loved ones do come in and out..

However, I am relieved now that I am 'washing my hands' from the burden of the essays -EE, TOK and few other requirements. All I have to do now is giving my best in the coming IELTS and IB Exam and the rest, TAWAKALTUALALLAH..

Hightlights of past few weeks/days/hours/seconds

• My lovely air-con'd class was robbed by the engineering students and we were sent to the deserted 3-floor-smaller-non air con'd-class. Cobaan...Lucky me, managed to get a 'windy' place. Now let's forget the fuss and loss some weight by climbing the stairs! *sigh
• I won a ticket to Boyz II Men concert this coming Saturday (Jan 27) from NST. Still thinking on whether I'm going or not. If I dont go, there goes my struggle kuar klas kul11-just to call-the NST reporter-answered 3 questions-and sang 3 lines from B2M's End Of The Road whole-heartedly effort..huu..
• Progress in my swimming class- I am still struggling to lift my head up in the breathing technique but I wont give up until I've nailed em down. Didnt attend the class last week as I was preparing for the interview
• Went out with Fuzah yesterday. Went to SOGO, accidentally bought 2 nice shirts *ouch
  
• Still in the battle of losing more kilos. Haha..the hope is still there, as long as I keep my stress level low, berusaha gigih to jog more kilometres and avoid going back home selalu, which is not possible. I think I need Shell..lebih kilometer! 3 weeks in McB, managed to loss * kg, but I think I gained double when I go back home (tido+tgk tv+internet+eat more than what I took in McB)..but I went swimming yesterday. 2 hours tau! hopefully some of the stubborn fats are burnt down

That's all for the time being. I need to change-going back to McB in few minutes from now and I havent taken my shower yet!!!!!! Tata~~~

The Interviewers..

Michael Murphy is Dean of the Faculty of Medicine and Health and Professor of Clinical Pharmacology, at University College, Cork. Since assuming leadership in 2000 he has overseen a programme of expansion and diversification, increasing the number of professional degree programmes from two (Medicine and Dentistry) to six (Nursing, Pharmacy, Speech Therapy and Occupational therapy), which will provide education, training and research opportunities for almost 3,000 students at steady state. The associated capital investment programme, the largest since the foundation of the faculty in 1845, exceeds Euros 100 million.

A 1976 graduate of the Medical School at UCC, Prof. Murphy undertook specialist training in Internal Medicine at University College, Dublin, and in Clinical Pharmacology at The Royal Postgraduate Medical School (now within Imperial College) and Hammersmith Hospital, London. During eight years at The University of Chicago he held faculty appointments in the Depts. of Medicine, Pharmacological and Physiological Sciences. He was chairman of Clinical Pharmacology from 1989-92.

Prof. Murphy has authored over 100 publications on therapeutic strategies for cardiovascular risk factors and disease, and has led several large international clinical trials. He has held office in many international and domestic professional organizations, government and industrial advisory panels. A past chairman of the Health Research Board of Ireland, he has recently been appointed to the Board of the Irish Health Service Executive.

• Prof Murphy was "the S" (refer to my previous post) who did all the talkings and questioning during my interview. He was so friendly and he made me feel comfortable throughout the interview.
  

Shaun McCann graduated in Medicine from University College Dublin in 1970. Following postgraduate training in Dublin and The University of Minnesota, USA, he was appointed as a Lecturer in Haematology at The University of Dublin, Trinity College in 1978. In 1983 he was appointed as Consultant Haematologist in St James’s Hospital, Dublin and in 1995 was appointed as George Gabriel Stokes Professor of Haematology in The University of Dublin, Trinity College. He was appointed as National Medical Director of The Blood Transfusion Service Board by invitation of The Minister for Health and Children for 18 months in 1995 and subsequently became a Board Member.

He carried out the first successful stem cell transplant for leukaemia in Ireland in 1984 and has since been Director of the National Unit which has performed over 800 stem cell transplants. He was the first president of The Haematology Association of Ireland and is a member of a number of Working Parties of The European Blood and Bone Marrow Transplant Group. He has been an active researcher into the diagnosis and treatment of haematological malignancies, aplastic anaemia and all aspects of stem cell transplantation. He is the author of over 130 scientific papers in peer-reviewed journals and numerous book chapters. He has a longstanding interest in undergraduate teaching and is the author of a text book in Haematology, Case-Based Haematology in 2005.

• Frankly, i'm hoping I would be selected to go to Trinity Coll. Dublin. Perhaps because more Malaysians are in Dublin. Prof McCann didnt talk much during the interview as he was busy jotting down points and notes while I was answering the Qs. Of course I made more eye contacts with Mr Murphy instead of him because I was answering to Prof Murphy's questions..Had I know Prof McCann is from TCD, I would talk to him more and ask questions about TCD to ensure my chance to enter TCD is higher..
  

Dublin- wayyy up there..and Cork- wayyyy down there..
Anywayyyyyss, whether it's Dublin or Cork, I just hope I could fly 7000 miles awayyy from Malaysia and complete my DDS with flying colours..



My IELTS is postponed to 23rd of February because the teacher forgot to register us for the test. LOL..Since IUMC will be considering the IELTS result before they would come up with the list of successful applicants, I really need to work hard to nail it! ONE down TWO more to go baby...ahak ahaks...